Working a Hangover

I had to work today, but I felt like hell. I had three glasses of wine last night, but I feel like I had six or eight. I got to go in late (10:30am), but I still felt horrible. And then the real fun began.

I work for a financial institiution. First, I had to help an elderly lady with dementia. Last week, she and her new attorney removed her granddaughter from her account; today she decided to put her back on. I spent quite a while trying to determine whether the granddaughter really has Gram’s best interests in mind, or if she’s skimming money from the poor lady’s account. I think it’s the latter of the two. Unfortunately, now that she is once again a joint owner, she can do whatever she pleases. However, in my research, I’ve found that the granddaughter accessed the lady’s home equity line of credit...a big no-no when you’re name’s not on the loan. Then there was the girl who couldn’t figure out how her money was gone from her checking account. I printed out the account history so she could plainly see how much she’s been working her debit card, and she still didn’t understand. "Where did my last paycheck go?" she asked. It was all I could do not to be sarcastic and, well, a little mean about it. I mean, come on...if you deposit $1000 and proceed to have 34 debits from your account, what exactly do you suppose is going to happen to your balance?

And then there was the Safe Deposit Box. That is usually not my favorite thing to do. You stand there, in the hallway, until the person is done rummaging through their stuff. You must not see the contents of their box. That’s it. There is nothing to read, nothing to sit on, nothing to do except stand there and think. On a day like today, that wasn’t such a bad thing, though, because it sure beat talking to someone or having to think a lot. I gladly clicked "assist" and got up to find the man in the lobby. It wasn’t long after I signed him in and he began rummaging that I heard it...a long, quiet, but quite destinct fart. Initially, I was amused, and looked forward to sharing my tale with my coworkers. Well, then the smell crept around the corner, took hold of my throat, and proceeded to choke me. I thought for sure that I would vomit. I mean, it smelled for all the world like he had soiled his drawers. Ten minutes later, when the man was done, I had to check the desk to make sure he’d removed all of his items. The smell was quite concentrated in that area, and I quickly grabbed the Lysol out of the bathroom, making sure that he was gone from the lobby. So much for hangover help.

Then there were the three people who signed in to see a rep at 1:55 (we close at 2:00pm). Thanks. There is one man who does it EVERY WEEK. I really think we should be able to tell him that he needs to get in earlier...no one goes to his place of employment and makes him stay late. Asshole.

Ah, don’t mind me, I’m just grumpy because I don’t feel good. I’ve been having a headache for more than a week now, too. I’m really not mean, honestly. I really want a cheeseburger, and I’m trying to coerce G to go to Fuddrucker’s. I may go without him. He and his friends were up until God knows when last night. A bunch of them came over here after his work party (more on that later), since we are close. If you read my previous blog, you know I wasn’t pleased about the idea, but he connived until he got his way. He put me on the spot, and asked if they couldn’t come over right in front of them. Bet he’s been practicing that one since late infancy. Anyway, my thinking is that he kind of owes me. I know he laid on the couch and ignored the children all day. He also left the dog out all night, so her barking ass woke me up at 6:00 this morning. Someone left the gate open last night, so she was not in the yard...she was on the front porch. I really hope he cleaned up the Green House. I also heard there was puking going on by one of the girls last night. I hope there’s none of that mess out back, either. I’m too old for this crap.

Archives-Happy Independence Day 7/5/2007

July 5, 2007

Ok, so I'm a day late. Yesterday G wasn't into the family thing--nothing stands in the way of volleyball, you know--so I went to my mom's with Ang. His volleyball people had a cookout at Hillsmere beach, which would be nice if I wouldn't be "alone" there. He seemed kind of offended that I didn't want to go...but he would have ignored the lot of us, except for the five minutes every couple hours that it would take him to inhale a hot dog. So, what difference would it make if I was there or not? It would have been me, hanging with the kids all day with no help and not much fun of my own. So...Mom's sounded like more fun. Her pool was frigid, so we sat around drinking mojitos while the kids jumped in and out of the baby pool a thousand times. Mom made burgers, and Ang made teriyaki and jerk (not together) chicken. I love me some jerk chicken. The tomatoes and corn and chipotle pasta salad were so good, too. And then the rain came, so we put on Cars and the kids assumed the position in front of the tv. Collin passed out and missed dinner entirely. G came along eventually, and we hemmed and hawed about going to see fireworks. It wasn't exactly an ideal night for viewing them, what with the storms and muggy-buggy dampness. At the last minute, we decided to go to our favorite viewing spot, which is the former Annapolis Overlook (now the WWII Memorial). Well, apparently the rain wasn't keeping anyone away, because we had to park way down the road and walk down the hill to see the fireworks, which had already started. We probably walked for 10 minutes (ok, maybe five to seven, but it sure felt like it). I was wearing uncomfortable sandals, I had to pee, and I was carrying the sleeping 27lb Booah, and G kept asking me why I couldn't walk any faster. SIGH. I'm old and fat, and aerobically challenged, that's why. Anyway, we got there and saw about 3 minutes of fireworks before the grande finale, and that was it...then had to trek back up the hill. I promised the kids a better fireworks experience next year, although they didn't seem too disappointed.
This weekend, my mom will have her annual 4th of July party, so thanks to my redneck relatives, there will be another fireworks display. They go all out. There will also be glow sticks, sparklers, and poppers. I miss childhood, I so used to look forward to those things every year. Sunday we are doing the zoo, with G's place of employment. That should be fun. I wish they'd actually close the zoo to the public, so as to limit other visitors. It would be nice to avoid the crowds, since it's supposed to be ungodly hot. I remember one trip to New Orleans, we wanted to visit the Audubon zoo with our friends...we get there, it was 100 degrees with 100% humidity (as it usually is in New Orleans), and the frickin' zoo was closed. It was Bank of America day or something-some big company was having their employee even there. We kept saying, How can you close the zoo?! Well, I wish they would.
I took the kids bowling on Tuesday. That was fun, except when it was my turn, I would get up to the foul line, and the pin resetter thing would come down and sweep the pins...I'd turn around, and there was the baby, pushing the button over and over again...looking at me with that little impish smirk on his face. That, and it took ten whole minutes for the baby's ball to reach the pins, if it ever did. A couple of times we just gave up and I rolled another ball down to push the first one.
Time to go straighten the living room, after the little tornados that are my children! I hope you all had a nice 4th.